 Imagine having a healthy relationship with food. How would that look for you? Feel? What would be different in your relationships, your health, your mental wellbeing? Or would letting go of rigid food rules and obsessive behaviours be too much risk… Is there too much fear of getting fat… and lazy… and generally being one of those people who just eats all the time…. Would it mean you were somehow “bad”? Because self-control, self-restraint, purity, cleanness, and ultimately skinniness… is somehow “good”? Somehow morally and ethically “good”? And if you don’t maintain this your descent into disorder and temptation and gluttony and fatness and hell, maybe even hell… is somehow guaranteed…. Scary stuff… The Purity StorySo where did this purity story come from? Skinny = pure = good. Saint Catherine of Sienna … dead at 33 from the effects of starvation… celebrated for her devotion to Christ… she fasted extremely and for periods ate only the Eucharist… Other women in the Middle Ages did the same… to imitate Christ’s suffering and prove their goodness… and were celebrated for it… Why should we feel “guilty” for eating? Gluttony is a sin in the Christian tradition… defined not as eating but as eating in excess in a way that harms the body and neglects the poor…. Sure, if you’re hooking into a feast and your neighbours are starving then guilt is probably an appropriate response… Intergenerational Trauma and Eating DisordersWhat’s the history of starvation in your family? POW camps? The Irish Famine? Boarding houses, rations, convicts… ? The cause of anorexia nervosa is said to be over 50% genetic… but the genetics of trauma, anxiety, starvation aren’t just predetermined… they’re cultural and historical… epigenetics need also to be considered… (although there’s scarce research on this)... The origins of the “thin ideal” and “scientific racism”And yes, the cultural ideal of thinness plays it’s part… a big part… despite the religious starvation going on in the Middle Ages, voluptuous bodies were still the ideal in Western societies until the 19th Century… (still a singular body “ideal” - where does that leave the rest of us?)... What changed? Racist supremacy. Otherwise known as “scientific racism” (are they trying to make it sound better?). Black, brown, and yellow bodies are inferior… and more often fat (was the theory). So fat = inferior. The idea took hold that black people are fat and indulgent but white people have self-control and restraint and good Christian ethics and are therefore skinny… and therefore white women must stay skinny to maintain the superiority of the race. I’m not making this shit up. Dr Kellogg founded the “Race Betterment Society” in 1914 and argued that a strict, restrictive diet would save the white race. (He also invented those bland cereals so you wouldn’t develop any “unhealthy passions” or be at risk of “sexual deviance”... Because being skinny proves you can control those sinful bodily desires, and even better if you’re a virgin.) Dr Sabring Strings lays it all out in her well researched book, Fearing the Black Body. Debunking the 'SWAG' Stereotype Does that mean black and brown people aren’t impacted by eating disorders? Not at all. Eating disorders impact people of colour just as much, if not more, than white populations. Because thinness is sold to everyone as “superior”. And how to climb the hierarchy of bodies when you can’t change your skin colour? The SWAG (skinny, white, affluent, girl) stereotype that permeates eating disorder research is mostly due to research being carried out in expensive treatment centres. People of colour are 50% less likely to receive a diagnosis or treatment when they experience eating disorders and are statistically less likely to even be assessed for an eating disorder, even when presenting with exactly the same symptoms. ED’s also impact people in all body sizes and genders. It’s still a gender issue (80% of people impacted are girls and women) but massively impacts the LBTQIA+ community and a significant number of boys and men. There’s a whole other lot of discourses we could explore here but they’re stories for another day… How Narrative Therapy HelpsHopefully we’ve established at this point that YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM. You’re genes, you’re brain chemistry, your temperament, your parents - NOT THE PROBLEM. What’s the problem then? Supremacist ideologies? Probably. The eating disorder (ED) itself is seen as the problem in narrative therapy. And the ED recruits these cultural and historical supremacist ideologies and whispers them to you in your own voice… In this way, narrative therapy explicitly locates the problem outside of you. Not even as a part of you, but as an unwelcome and dangerous intruder. Investigating the Tactics of the Eating DisorderMaybe the ED is saying right now “but I help you be better”, “you couldn’t survive without me”, “I’ll help you to be good and perfect and then you’ll be happy”... narrative therapy would suggest questioning that. EDs are tricksters and liars… they masquerade as friends and then kill people… or at least seriously harm their health, life and relationships… And they convince you that it’s not that bad… that all the distress and health impacts are due to some unrelated reason… and that if you follow all the ED’s rules you’ll be made pure and good and lovable… but if you don’t… only guilt and shame… What if you’re enough without having to prove yourself? Externalising the Problem and Exploring ImpactExternalising the problem, or the ED… doesn’t just mean situating it outside of yourself… it means then investigating the ED… it’s tricks and tactics, it’s intention, when is it stronger or weaker, it’s purpose and promises, it’s lies… what ideas or cultural stories keep it alive… are their contexts or environments where those ideas are stronger…. What impact does the ED have on your life? Maybe in the beginning you got only praise for being skinny… attention, flattery… but maybe you also constantly think about food, and plan meals, and obsess… or restrict and have no energy… or can’t go out with friends… or binge and then compulsively exercise and then restrict again… or… or…. or… ED’s will convince people that it’s not that bad… that actually you are fat… that only if you keep listening to the ED will things get better… but it doesn’t deliver… it promises goodness but only breeds shame… And listen… maybe none of this fits for you… maybe your ED has hijacked some other kind of cultural ideas or life experiences… it’s opportunistic like that… Acts of Resistance: Reclaiming Your Preferred IdentitySo how to break free… what does having a healthy relationship with food look like in your life? The narrative therapy approach is to slowly and gently support you to untangle from the ED web… and to strengthen and thicken the alternative stories… your preferred identity… and it starts with one small step… Maybe it’s reading this blog till the end… has the ED been arguing against my words this whole time?… maybe it’s going to therapy even when the ED doesn’t want you to… maybe it’s resisting the idea that your “goodness” is determined by how much, or how little, you ate today… maybe it’s actually eating when you’re hungry and feeling entitled to joy and pleasure and nourishment… maybe it's having a bath... Because that one small… but significant… act of resistance… could speak to what you hope for… what you value and want for your life… how you would prefer things to be… What does it take for you to resist?… what hard won skills and knowledge can you hold on to moving forward?… And the ED will probably fight back… recovery is rarely a straight line… but it’s possible… ED Recovery Resources and Possible Next StepsCheck out these inspiring stories at The Archive of Resistance… comment on this post and share your own…
I’d also recommend the books “Dead Weight” by Emmeline Clein which “aims to galvanize readers against disordered eating”... and “Biting the Hand that Starves You - Inspiring Resistance to Anorexia/ Bulimia” by Richard Maisel, David Epston, and Ali Borden.…. we’re stronger when we fight together… If you need someone else on your team… check out NOURISHED - A Narrative Therapy Workshop For Women or get in touch re 1-1 narrative therapy sessions… available in person in Byron Bay or online via secure Telehealth...
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